Drama

I try my best to avoid drama in my life. I don't like it. One time when I was substitute teaching, I saw a girl who had a t-shirt made that read "Save the drama for your mama." I've always liked that t-shirt. Maybe I should get one of those printed sometime. Despite my aversion to drama, it seems to follow me around a bit, taunting me, as if to say "you can never get away from me."

Recently some more drama has entered my life, of which I will share the details at a later time. For now, consider it sufficient that I tell you that life continues to go on. Life can be very tiring at times; it's just so daily. Nevertheless, I find myself desiring to be a part of it and to share it with people that I love dearly. But that's not what this post is about. I secretly read a friend's friend's blog, and I laugh almost every time. So, I wanted to make my own readers laugh. But I just couldn't think of any funny stories to share. Is it my attempt at the avoidance of drama that leaves me void of funny stories? Or am I really just that boring? How can this be? Surely comedy must accompany my life aside from the Great Comedian's working in more than amusing ways. Now, He surely is a funny God--beyond all that I can take at times. His comedies, however, are usually accompanied by an attitude of "what in the world were you thinking, God?" and seem to resemble irony more than mere comedy. I can't at all say that I've ever figured out what He is thinking. In fact, I recently told a co-worker that I don't always like God, but that I have learned to trust Him. You can all stone me later for saying that I don't always like God. But then I will say that whoever has never thought such heretical thoughts can throw the first stone. Come on, I dare you.

In addition to the irony, the comedy from God's working in my life is often a result of my own handling of the situation. For instance, when I don't like what He's doing or has allowed to happen, I have, at times, reverted to the silent treatment. I will attempt to "punish" God by withholding my contact with Him. Now, I am not proud of this behavior; it is downright despicable and, quite honestly, never works. I ALWAYS end up the worse for it. Heed this warning: Do not under any circumstances try this heathenistic approach. More recently, I have been heard doing monologues of my own take on biblical characters, namely Job's wife. Despite the laughter from my peers this performance was simply a revelation of my deplorable cynicism toward God's people and His apparent (I know this isn't true!) lack of compassion toward me, which ended in a an imperative to curse God and die. I now know why I wasn't chosen for my story to be recorded in Scripture. I surely would have been thought a crazed, strong-willed, and defiant follower of God, if not found an imposter first.

How I have digressed. When I couldn't think of any funny stories to share I tried to think of things about me or that have happened to me that you may find amusing. I have listed them below:

I once dressed up as a beheaded John the Baptist for a Halloween party with my youth group.

One of my most embarrassing moments came from me announcing over the entire high school intercom that Marilyn Manson's backpack was in the front office. (No, I didn't know who Marilyn Manson was.)

Upon meeting a girl at a new job, I accidentally threw cake crumbs all over her when I was trying to serve her a piece of cake.

I like to dance like a madwoman when no one is around.

In college, I ate an entire gigantic box of Nerds in one sitting, resulting in a tongue that was raw for several days.

One of my fantasy jobs is to be a voiceover in a cartoon movie. The other is to be a college mascot.

I like Star Trek. When I found out the newest one was going off the air, I wrote an email to the network expressing my displeasure.

I cannot play video games, because I started a Lord of the Rings computer game and could barely stop playing until I beat it. And, my blood pressure would go so extraordinarily high while playing that I was concerned about the effect it was having on my heart.

I can do a fairly decent Yoda voice.

Well, that's all that I can think of in my tired and sleepy state. I hope I was able to deliver at least a couple of laughs.