Your God is Too Safe

During and after the hurricane, I posted on this blog a little bit about my struggle with God's workings in the world, particularly about the lack of safety that I felt being in His care. The only conclusion of hope that I could cling to is the truth of knowing that He is good in all things.

I still struggle with the safety of God. I saw a book in the store the other day whose title was "Your God is Too Safe." I marveled that someone could have written a book about my own little struggles. I guess it's a common struggle among believers. I flipped through the book, taking notes that I may want to buy it sometime and then put it back onto the shelf. A few days later a woman walked into the store and asked for the book by name. I immediately took her to it, and she purchased it. More fellow strugglers, I guess.

I am thinking that running across that book (and in fact another one online entitled "Not a Safe God") was not just coincidence. My slow aptitude for learning and retaining instruction from God does not always provide for easily gained insight. At times, Stephen and I struggle with God's calling on our lives. We knew a Christian marriage would be an adventure, but I think we were hoping the adventure would include more of our own plans. First, the call to seminary took us away from family and friends when we so desperately wanted to be with them. When Stephen's grandfather was struggling to live and my grandfather was dying of cancer, we hated to be so far away. When a hurricane brought flooding and destruction beyond imagination, we hated that God had placed us in New Orleans. But, that's where He placed us. We were learning that to be in the center of His will does not indicate that we will be safe or comfortable.

Now, we are closer to home. However, we tried all avenues that we could to remain in Georgia. All doors were shut. One opened in Alabama, and we believe that, once again, His calling has brought us out of our desire for safety. Away from friends and family, we struggle with His wisdom. Our life here has not been easy, but we have seen God's hand of restoration on our lives. Our plans once again have not always been a part of God's adventure for us. Certainly in my job search my plans did not meet His--in any way. I see His wisdom but question it at the same time. And then we go home for a weekend of refreshment with friends--tons of friends-- and are once again reminded that God has called and placed us within His will, which just happens to be away from our own. Often when we go home, we stare at safety in the face and are haunted by its desirous net when we head off in our car toward that which laughs in the face of certainty.

My prayer has so often been for God to use me to be a great instrument to make His name known among all peoples. So, why do I cringe when He seeks to accomplish my prayer? I think that I have neglected to see God for ALL of who He truly is. He is love and comfort, but He is also wild, strong, and sometimes unpredictable. My God has been too safe. What was I thinking that counting the cost of following Him would include?--close proximity to safety?--lack of struggle?--no need for trust? My God has been too safe. If I truly search scripture for God's desire, His followers were only safe when the glory of His name needed them to be safe. God called Abraham to a land of which Abraham knew nothing. God called His prophets to do all sorts of crazy things; Jeremiah was even thrown into a big hole to die because of God's word. God called Jesus to die. Almost all of Jesus' disciples were martyred. So, what was I expecting?

I believe that I've truly neglected to consider the cost. To follow God I must be willing to move away from comfort and safety. I must be willing to allow Him and to trust Him to care for those with whom I want to be close while I have been called away. I must seek daily to understand the purpose for why He has called me here. He does not do things without purpose; so what is mine?